Monday, June 11, 2007

We're okay, daddy's just lazy.

I want to assure anyone who happens to find this dusty back-water of the internet by accident or on purpose that Lil'screamie hasn't been abandoned - It just seems like the "daddy story" post, some ugly advertising business and spending almost all of my waking hours at a computer screen - not by choice but of necessity, has taken a lot of the fun out of sitting at this computer in the wee hours trying to think of something new to say. It turns out that it's easy to find things to say with Dear Alex and her amazing progress in the world, but how many ways can you say "She's so cute" and "she's so smart" without boring yourself and any reader to numbness?

Perhaps it's simply to write as I originally thought, about what it's like to have this incredible responsibility and love that simply overtakes everything in your life and teaches you humility and patience and how to be amazed again by little things. I wrote about "mindfulness" a while back and why it's important to keep track of the little things about her development (oh, such a clinical word for such a miraculous thing) and the things that Beautiful Wife and I do with her and for her amusement and delight, (and ours, too, as it turns out) and I didn't keep up with my own hopes for that - there will be some gaps, and I'm feeling as though if it's not written somewhere, it's lost in the ever-changing now. I want to make note of the sweet moments, and the odd stuff that we do to keep Dear Alex and ourselves entertained and educated, like this:

We came back from the country early on Sunday, mostly because Beautiful Wife and I were feeling guilty about taking Friday off and we wanted to get a head start on worrying about the week to come, so we had a bit of the afternoon to kill. BW suggested that we take Dear Alex to visit a firehouse so that Dear Alex could see a "firetruck" up close. It's an amazing thing to do with a kid. All our child knows of firetrucks is the loud siren and horn and lights as the great beasts roar up the avenue past our apartment, all thunder and light - she never fails to shout "firetruck!" and point as they pass - so, we put the kid in her stroller and set out to find our local station, and found it easily. Holding her up to the windows in the great red garage doors made her point and squeal with happiness - "two firetrucks in the garage". It only got better when one of the firemen invited us in - It stuck me that the fireman was more than happy that anyone took an interest in them and what they did, and he was more than happy to open a door for show and tell. (The NYFD guys are truly great, and I am in awe of their service and how genuinely nice they are.) Dear Alex was stunned speechless. Two sleeping giants in this great garage, up close and shiny and red and real. She loved it (and recovered her speech later - "two firetrucks in the garage!!") - this is one that she'll remember.
I'll remember it, too, because having a toddler with you can open doors and give you a point of view that you would never even think to think about - what other reason on earth would motivate anyone to visit a firehouse in New York City on a late Sunday afternoon, and feel so good about having done something so simple, yet so grounding?

1 comment:

Cindy said...

As the mother of a 13 year old, I can assure you that unless you make an effort to keep track of all the little things, it's so sad how time erases even the good memories. I wish I had done so with my older daughter. So many precious stories are now forgotten, never to be retrieved again unless I somehow happen to remember them.
Now that I have another little one, I will not make that mistake again.
You will never regret documenting these precious memories.